2020: April

Yes. It's been 4 months since my last post. No, I wasn't busy, I just wasn't feeling in the mood to do it.

So, Where can I begin.

2020 it's not been the year I imagined. I m not going to be dramatic and say that it's the worst year of my life but it's not the best one either.

2020 started with bad news. There was an outbreak going on in China that infected thousands and killed someone. But at that time we didn't care, cause it was too far away from here.

Meanwhile, the world got devasted by one of the saddest news. Kobe Bryant's Death. And to make it worst, his little girl Gianna was also on the plane. Honestly, I did not know him, I knew that he was this huge NBA player but I never got the chance to see him shine and do his best and his contribution to the world until his death. It's kinda sad that someone needs to die to give them the attention they deserved. On the plane were also killed GiGi mates, some of their parents, and her coach. It's really sad to see these people's lives getting destroyed in a few seconds. It made me think about what I've been doing with my life and my dream.

After that, I just clicked. I knew that I did not want to waste my life doing something I did not like it. So I got in touch with this studio next to my house, to try to see if they would give me an opportunity to make music and start my dream. They gave me the chance to audition for them. I sent the videos they wanted. I never got an answerback.

I started to feel really sad and depressed. I didn't know what to do more. I was not happy with my life and I was struggling cause my time was running out since I only had a few months before starting college. I was at the bottom.

Grammy's happened. Demi performed Live for the 1st time in the last 2 years. It was emotional, the last time I cried like that, I did it when she sang "Sober" in Rock in Rio Lisbon 2018. Plus, Billie Eilish and Finneas bring the house and got 7 grammy's from her album. It's insane.

Superbowl happened. JLo and Shakira Killed that half time show. Unfortunately, the 49ers lost.

During all those things. I paid to go to my senior prom.

After this, the worse happen. The virus spread to the world. And Got here. It's COVID-19.
I never thought things like this were ever going to happen. The truth is on 12th March, the government announced the School's close. The impossible happened!
Looking back, I never thought that my last school day ever was on 13th March due to having to be in quarantine. I never thought that were my last moments with my mates. Probably the last time I would see them. It's kinda sad when we don't have the chance to say goodbye.

And yeah. Today is 22nd April and we have been in quarantine for over a month. We didn't stop, we have to do a lot of work at home but it's weird.

Last year, around this time, I was praying for God to give me an opportunity to work on my music. To free me from my toxic friend. To give me a chance even if just time. The truth is, he did.
Yeah, I m kinda lazy at school but I have time to work on my music to stay home the way I wanted. It's unimaginable his power.

Also, because of all the virus thing, there has not been much CO sent to the sky and space. The planet got much more time. Unfortunately, we had to suffer for it.

Today I am planning to build a home studio to make music. I wasted to much time waiting for a miracle to happened and I wanna try. I wanna make sure that when I get to my 30, I don't regret being a nurse. Because At the end of the day, I did my best with music but it was not my path. That's probably my biggest fear. Don't have tried hard enough.

With the gyms close for at least 2 months, without a Senior Prom or any trip, I could get enough money to buy everything I need. Billie did her entire album and songs on his brother's bedroom. My dream it's not done. I may only have a 0.00001% possibility to achieve my dream, but I want to make sure I did my best. Until I get officially into college I have 5 months. I wanna make them worth it. If this is going nowhere, at least I wanna make this investment the reason why I get fun and smile every day.

-Blue